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im not ignoring your snapchats, im just too ugly to reply at the moment

if my jokes offend you:

  1. i’m sorry
  2. it won’t happen again
  3. 1 & 2 are lies 
  4. you’re a pussy





I’ve been waiting for this gifset my whole life.

So I’m assuming at least 95% of tumblr is hearing this whole scene perfectly in their head, right?

the idea of people not hearing this in their head is inconceivable

This is a movie I could rewatch forever.




We are forced to live in a system that steals from us daily, Kill snitch culture.

Important things to keep in mind!

- never take from ‘mom and pop’ type store. Its likely you’ll actually harm them, whereas taking from a walmart wont effect much.

- never take items that a worker is assigned to monitor (usually super expensive items), theyll be in trouble for it. and its usually a minimum wage worker and usually they lose hours or pay, or they even get fired.

- similar to the above, never take things that are usually locked up for the above reason

- if its a store you know gives their near-expiration products to workers/charity, try to avoid taking the near expiration products.

- if youre taking clothing, avoid leaving hangers. it sounds weird, but itll make it seem like it was more likely an error in the computer than a theft, since the empty hanger sitting there will seem suspicious. 

- also for clothing, try not to take more than one item at once, as it will look suspicious if theres 10 medium shirts missing, and it won’t be written off as just a stocking error. and it will lead to workers being penalized

- basically just always consider ‘will this harm a worker’ and if the answer is yes then dont do it

like i was homeless for a while when i was younger and i tried to follow those guidelines to avoid doing harm to people who were probably not much better off than me while trying to get food for myself.


this is WRONG and IGNORANT and there is no such thing as harmless stealing. You ALWAYS hurt the minimum wage employee and even the lower level members of management that are only making a few bucks more than the employees.

"….taking from a walmart wont effect much." I currently work for a walmart, and before that i worked for a target and this is the biggest lie in this post. the more theft that takes place in the store, the more our hours are cut and the more firings that take place. There are signs in our break rooms to encourage us to report theft for this reason. Stores will never hide the ways that theft hurts employees. For example, during last year’s holiday season there was an unusually high level of theft going on and we’d find empty packages and hangers everywhere. During that january they cut our hours to a grinding halt and some weeks i didn’t get over 15 hours because Walmart needed to cut back from the money it lost in the holiday season. 30 hours in 2 weeks wasn’t shit when i was trying to pay bills and make rent and keep myself afloat, and this is even with me making over the min wage. At Target, i wouldn’t do more than 5 hour shifts twice a week during all the thefts there.

Not only does that affect our earnings, it also takes a toll when they only schedule one person per department and have 3 cashiers on schedule. Walmart is especially notorious for this and will leave the employees to pick up the slack. Not only do we end up underpaid but also overworked.

Sure, major retailers have insurance policies in place to replace stolen or lost merchandise, so the store isn’t at much of a loss but the employees still face repercussions. This kind of bullshit is being circulated around tumblr as if stealing is a harmless and righteous action of protest but it’s not. so yeah FUCK YEAH i WILL report the asshole that is taking from the store, and i will get A.P. on your punk ass because it’s not right that we have to suffer for you to be edgy.

TLDR: you will ALWAYS affect the employees.

Yeah seriously. How about uhhh DONT FUCKING STEAL STUFF AT ALL??????

why the hell would people need a post on what and how to steal. Don’t steal. Pay for it like everyone else motherfucker.

Happy Easter followers and friends!

Enjoy the day and God bless :)


It’s not about the bunny


Patti LuPone sings into a dildo. With great fervor. Then holds it for Bridget Everett. Then discards the dildo. Into the audience. 

If I ever visit Joe’s Pub I will kiss that fucking stage. 

What the fuck


Sudsy Tilikum

suggested by: bathe-the-whales

Drawn by: me